[Photo by Ryan Franco on Unsplash] Our roles as therapists are characterized by the ability to create and hold space, bear witness to vulnerability and change, and attend to the dynamic and varying needs of our clients. Our roles as mothers and caregivers often demand these very same things. The transition to motherhood fundamentally changes…
Relationships
The Language of (Emotional) Pain and the Case for Expanding Our Vocabulary
[Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash] “I feel melancholy sometimes, especially lately” said my friend as he leaned back in his chair. We were sitting in my backyard. The sun had just set and the sky had that lovely deep blue hue that appears for just a few brief moments as the day and…
Rippling: Finding Meaning in a Turbulent World
“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” ― Maya Angelou I stood in the hospital hallway. My son was just taken from me for an emergency surgery. I could not follow him. It made sense and it…
Self-Care During Marital Separation
This year may have been daunting considering the circumstances we have all been through in 2020; we’ve been cooped up inside and socially distancing for almost the entire year. However, some of you have had other issues preoccupying your mind and have been going through the process of breaking things off in your relationship with…
Assertiveness Training: Using DEAR-MAN Tool to Get More of What You Want and Less of What You Don’t
What makes communication important? Communication refers to the manner in which we express ourselves with one another. Communication, whether verbal or nonverbal, is used to pass information to others and, conversely, to understand what is shared with us (Gudykunst, 2004). While the premise of exchanging information seems simple, communication can feel fraught when setting a…
How to Co-Parent During the Coronavirus Pandemic
Co-parenting post-divorce is complicated and it can take time to develop a functioning system. It becomes even more difficult when additional factors are thrown into the mix and disrupt the system that you and your co-parent have developed. There is no doubt that the presence of the coronavirus pandemic will alter the way that you…
When Should We Come in for Relationship Counseling?
One of the most common questions I hear early on in relationship counseling is, understandably, “Can you help us? Is there hope?” The feelings of fear and doubt are clearly present behind these questions, and the answer is never a simple “yes” or “no.” One of the biggest determinants of positive outcomes in couples therapy…
Conflict in Relationships: The Importance of Language
There is simply no way to avoid conflict in a long-term relationship with an intimate partner. Conflict is an intrinsic part of relationships. You are two different people who are spending a lot of time together. As you are each your own person, you are bound to find things about your partner that do not…
Demystifying Gottman-Based Couples Counseling
We are inundated with relationships-focused books that offer a variety of often contradictory advice. The multitude of perspectives can be overwhelming. It is easy to feel paralyzed. Which advice is right? What will actually make a positive, sustainable difference in a committed relationship? The Gottman Method of couples therapy provides couples with accessible, evidence-based blueprint…
Why Mindfulness Matters in Relationship-Centered Care: Should You Care if Your Doctor or Therapist Meditates?
In all my years of supporting expectant parents as they navigate their pregnancy, birth and parenting, finding the right health care providers, the right therapists, the right doula has been front and center for them, and for those of us who are advocates. We’ve created guides and lists, and even healthcare personality quizzes to help…
